1. Tap the brain 🧠

Every tap earns Stupidity and quietly lowers your IQ. That's the whole engine of your downfall. Tap fast for a combo; tap forever because you can't stop.

2. Make Bad Decisions 🤦

Spend your Stupidity on Bad Decisions — Tide Pods, pigeon consultants, podcasts, microwaved forks, a portal in the garage. Each one keeps earning Stupidity for you, even while you're tapping (or asleep, or at work). Buy in batches with the ×1 / ×10 / ×100 / Max toggle.

3. Buy Upgrades ⬆️

Upgrades multiply your taps, juice up a specific Bad Decision, or boost everything. They unlock as you sink deeper. The shop hides what you can't afford yet, because hope is important.

4. Catch random events ✨

Things drift across the screen. Click the Golden Brain Cell for a ×7 frenzy, the Sugar Rush for absurd taps, a Free Sample for a lump sum — and if you ever see a big red button that says DO NOT PRESS… you know what to do.

5. Reincarnate ♻️

Once you're sufficiently stupid, reincarnate: lose everything you've built, come back as something dumber (goldfish → pigeon → houseplant → influencer → rock → pure static), and bank Dumb Points that boost all future production, forever. This is how the truly committed get ahead. It's called progress. Sort of.

Every new body changes the game. Each creature reskins the whole thing – new colors, a recolored brain, its own confetti, even its own tap sound – and grants a unique Life Perk: goldfish earn at full speed while you're gone, rocks hit the button ×2, Tide Pods make Tide Pods pay ×777. The brain also grows a little every rebirth, and the googly eyes get… noticeably worse. By Pure Static they orbit.

6. Climb the Hall of Shame 💩

Submit your score to the global leaderboard and prove, in public, that you are stupider than your friends. Your progress autosaves to this browser. There is no winning. There is only more.